A Chat for the Ladies…

“Dignity does not consist in possessing honors, but in the consciousness that we deserve them.” 
― Aristotle


Ladies whatever happened to our sense of dignity in modern society? Why do we allow ourselves to be portrayed in such horrific ways? We are portrayed as tools on the front of a Play Boy cover. Some kind of meat that people can drool over. We are portrayed as being the perfect wives with the perfect body and homes in magazines. We are told to look a certain way and to always go out in make up. 

Let me tell you something you have probably not been told in a long time. You look great without make up! You are not a doll. We fought for centuries to gain a place in this society. Now we are told that our natural skin our natural eye color is not good enough. We are told that our breast size is not big enough. We are told that if we do choose to stay at home even without having kids that we are lazy. That we need to provide our way through. But then we are told we are lazy and gross if the house is a mess because we work full time.

Ladies give it a break! You cannot have both worlds. To be a true home maker means doing the laundry, cooking food from scratch, knowing how to sew, keeping the home clean and organized. To be a true worker means to excel in the workplace and focus on money. If your with someone that loves homemaking and you love working then that works too! You should never be told where your place is in society. Your heart knows where your place is. If you are a mom honestly your place is with your children. If you are a single mom then do all you can to one day work from home. Your children do not need to be told how to grow up by strangers in the school system. That is something I will blog on later. The horrors of both the public and private school systems. 

Why do you feel like you have to give yourself away? If you are not married please save your body and be single. A condom will not protect you from STDs. In fact condoms contain spermicides that will cause you to be sterile. If you are using condoms now to avoid pregnancy you are only weakening your chances to get pregnant later in life. Your best choice is to remain celibate. In 2011 Psychology Today put out an article called Sex: Intelligent Intercourse. Here is a quote from that article. 

People with high executive functioning—in judgment, decision-making, and impulse control—usually have what’s called a slow life history strategy, notes Aurelio José Figueredo, an evolutionary psychologist at the University of Arizona: They tend to have fewer partners and less sex but more resources (such as money and status) to invest in potential offspring.


If you are already saving yourself please keep doing so. Do not feel like you need to find a guy because your friends are making fun of you. You are not missing a lot. I waited until I was married and I do not regret it. I was made fun of a lot. I was told you have no idea what you are missing. I would say how? I wont know until I try it. So I am not missing anything. Why create an urge that was not there? That is added stress.

You will be the shoulder others cry on when they find out that they are pregnant earlier then they expected to be or they have a life threatening disease. Focus on having an adventure in your early twenties. I settled down at 21 it was too early for me looking back on my life now. I do not regret getting married or getting married to the person that I did. I regret being 21 at doing that. Now that I am 27 I know myself a lot better. I think I would have had a stronger future if I had waited until I was in my late 20s to get married. Maybe my lesson I had to learn can help you. That is why I shared it. Please just let people make fun of you but take the time to enjoy being free. 

If you are in your late twenties and still have not found the right person don’t settle to be a mom. You can always adopt later on in life. You do not NEED to create life. There are children who are alive right now who are desperate and NEED your love. Foster parents are also needed. Babies become teenagers. Teenagers become adults. Your baby will not stay cute forever. He or she will need an education a good education. The worst thing you can do is raise a child that cannot think for him or herself. We do not need more children that are created to sit in front of a TV. We have had enough of that and look where it has got us. Not very far. We need thinkers, creators, inventors, artists, healers, and teachers badly. We do not need slave and drone children. 

If you have thought about homeschooling please go for it! If you are a single mom who has to work understandable. Please find a talent that you can make money at home doing! Be home with your children! However do not quit your job this second because of this blog. If you do work as hard as you can to put food on the table that is good. Not every parent does that. However pick that one crazy dream and follow it. J.K. Rowling wrote Harry Potter in a cafe on napkins………….

Another thing that bothers me with being female the way that we are expected to dress. It is so hard to find something that will cover all parts of the body! Not everyone enjoys clothes that cling to their breasts or stick to their bum! You do not need to be viewed and loved for your physical attributes. Flaunting what you have will cause negative attention. You really want to keep that to yourself. You want people to notice your personality and your kind soul. Not your breasts and your butt. 

While we are discussing the physical I am going to go a little off the deep end. Shaving! Stop shaving the pubic area! You hit puberty for a reason. It is because you develop from looking like a little girl into a woman. You are not a little girl so why should you look like one? If you are a male reading this it is gross IF you are into that sort of thing.(I have met males who find females that shave disgusting)  Children have no hair! Do you find children attractive? I hope not.

So why would you expect women to be shaven? There is nothing sexy about taking an adult part of the body and making it child like! You have pubic hair so feces and urine do not go into the vagina or urethra. Same with a male. You have pubic hair to keep bacteria and viruses from going into your urethra. The hair is coarse because it traps the stuff you do not want inside of you. If you do not have it the bacteria will breed into the open areas. Those open areas go directly into your body. I am sure you shower once a day at least. It does not matter. Bacteria builds throughout the day. I am sure you use the bathroom more then once a day at work and you cannot shower at work in between going to the bathroom. What happens when you start to sweat? Toilet paper does not kill bacteria and viruses! You do not want to have to go to the ER for random severe pain and have some stranger dealing with a situation that could have been prevented in the first place. 

Now I am not encouraging looking like the Yetti either. Stay trimmed but do not wax or shave. Shaving also leaves you open to getting cuts. What if you nick an area and you get bacteria in your blood stream? Fecal bacteria is fatal in the blood. So the next time you hear people saying people who do not shave are gross just laugh in your brain. Your not going to get an infection because you choose to have hair. 

Be proud of having an adult body. 

Your body. You need to take care of it. I am seeing a horrible mindset reversal in social media. Women are now posting that it is cool to be chunky. Having a big butt is in and having curves is in. If you are NATURALLY curvy that is fine. Be NATURALLY curvy. However be proud if you are .  There is no pride in being chunky due to your own choices. Now if you are over weight due to a health disorder that is different. I have been there. I was on medications that made me blow up faster then a baby orca before. It took me years of sweat and tears just to be able to figure out how to be healthy. For me I found eating vegetarian, lactose, and gluten free is best. I am tired of people taking pride in being unhealthy. Having a heart attack is not sexy! Rock climbing, hiking, dancing, running, walking, etc is. If you eat as healthy as you possibly can and you are active and you still hold onto weight then that is who you are! Take pride in that also! 

If you have a large breast size do not flaunt it. You do not have to push your breasts into your face and wear a low cut top to have us notice! We really do not care as human beings. I want to know that there is intelligence in your brain. Breasts are not intended to be sex objects (listen up men!). They are used to feed babies! That is it! Your big size is no different then my smaller size and they all do the same thing! I do not understand the big deal. 

This topic was written out of love not to judge. If you have made mistakes in life or life is not the way it was supposed to turn out for you that is okay. If you are a young mom be the best young mom to that child! However if you are struggling with the children that you do have do not create more. Focus your resources on the life that you do have. If you are blessed in many ways then by all means procreate! Life is amazing and should be created! But life should not be created due to a one night drunken fling or affair. 

Please start living with pride. Do not display your body as a trademark through make up, clothes, tattoos, getting drunk, and getting laid. You are not owned you are not a trademark. Please be free no matter what age you are. I do not care if you are 15 or 75. Focus on your mind Ladies! Be intelligent! Your bodies are just a physical thing. What is inside truly counts! It shows when I meet someone who focuses on their mind over their body. Those are the people I call my friends.

Thanks for reading this. 






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